Monday Musings

cliche

WARNING: I’m about to have some fun at the expense of writers. Y’all know I’m an asshole, so here goes:

Is there an unwritten romance writing rule that you insert these phrases, actions, descriptors into your narrative cause I swear I read these in every other book I read. And don’t even act like you don’t know what I’m talking about…

Exhibit 1: The Messy Bun

This is the go-to hairstyle in romance. The heroine with long hair always pulls her hair into a messy bun, and I.want.to.scream. Can we get a new hairstyle please?

messy-bun-hairstyles-1
In my day, your hair was called looking tore up from the floor up

Exhibit 2: Guy gets exasperated and pinches the bridge of his nose

I have never witnessed this in my life. And why does he do that? What does it accomplish because I’ve tried it, and I get nada…

pinch noseExhibit 3: Cumming On Command

Where are these men? Where dey at doe? Damn near erry story I read, dude pinches, sucks, tugs, pumps and commands “Come for me…” and the heffa falls apart right at that moment. I feel so damn cheated…

orgasm-1050x739

I know there are more, but these are my top 3. Like for real…

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18 thoughts on “Monday Musings

  1. Hahahahaha!!! You are too funny! I think the only one I’ve done is #3. Alas, my only rebuttal is that this is a dream of mine. It has never happened to me, so I like to live vicariously through my stories. Teehee… But I will be conscious of it from now on. Not saying I won’t do it, but maybe not as much. 😉

  2. BWAHAHAHAHA!!! I can’t breathe! CTHU!!! Stop!

    I roll my eyes every time a hero lifts a heroine into his arms…regardless of her size…while they’re kissing and she locks her feet around his waist as he walks to the bedroom/shower/sofa. I mean, really? LMAO!

    1. No one can manage that unless they’re a professional ballet dancer. 🙂 I hate the ‘messy bun’ but I would totally read a romance novel called ‘tore up from the floor up’.

  3. She’s able to cum on command because he’s always hitting ALL the right spots, including her g-spot every. single. time. No matter if it’s his fingers or cock or even his tongue! 😂😂😂

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